Vegeta's Hair
by InherentlyDamned
Summary: How does Vegeta's hair stick up like that? ! Is it really just saiyan genes? Or something more? Could it be ... Gooey Gel? Hair Spray? Tape? Trunks and Goten will stop at nothing to find out... Rated for language.
1. The Quest Begins

Disclaimer- I think we can safely assume that I don't own this.

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Chapter One - The Mystery that is Vegeta's Hair

Peeking around the corner and into the living room, Trunks and Goten crouched at the doorway, doing their best to remain unnoticed.

Just a few feet away sat Vegeta, facing directly away from them so that all they could see was his spiky black hair peeking up from behind the couch. The prince of all saiyans was lounging about, totally absorbed in a television program.

It wasn't often that the prince was so distracted, so this was a golden opportunity for Trunks & Goten to observe him (safely).

The main thing on the two demi-sayians' minds was a question that has plagued mankind for decades : How the heck does his hair stay up like that?

"I bet he uses that gooey gel stuff" whispered Goten.

"Ewww! No way! He wouldn't do that! Yuck!" Trunks whispered back.

"Would too! Gohan said that _he_ used to use it!"

"Yeah but Gohan is …" Trunks paused and rephrased, "Just cause Gohan used it doesn't mean my dad does Goten."

"Yeah it does!"

"Does not!"

"Does too!"

"Does not!"

"Does too!"

"Does NOT!"

"Does TOO!"

"DOES NOT!"

"DOES TOO!"

"WHAT ARE YOU TWO BRATS BLABBERING ABOUT!"

Trunks & Goten gulped and looked up to see Vegeta looming above them with an irritated scowl on his face.

"Well?"

"N-n-nothing dad! … uh we'll be going now!" stammered Trunks as he grabbed Goten and they zoomed away to Trunks' room.

Vegeta crossed his arms and looked in the direction the boys had run away. '_Stupid brats … they're up to something … I know it.' _The frown on Vegeta's face deepened as he stomped off to the GR.

'_I'll be safe from their mayhem in here!' _(AN: -cough- )

**-In Trunks' Room-**

"Yikes that was -huff- a close one!" Goten panted.

Trunks ignored him, deep in thought. Goten recognized this look on Trunks' face and was quiet; waiting for Trunks to come up with a plan of some sort (after all, Trunks is the brains of the operation!).

Finally Trunks snapped his fingers. "I've got it!"

"What Trunks?"

Trunks smirked a royal saiyan smirk.

"Ok, this is what we'll do …"

**-Outside the GR-**

"Alright, we'll wait 'til he comes out, then we spray him!" Trunks said excitedly, brandishing a super powered water pistol.

"But why Trunks? This seems a little dangerous …" Goten said nervously.

"Gosh don't be such a baby Goten! You see, if my dad is wearing the gooey gel, then when we spray him, his hair will fall over! And if it doesn't, then I'm right and he doesn't use that stuff."

"Oh … well ok Trunks …"

The two little saiyans scurried into the bushes to hide, trying to fight down the urge to laugh. No matter what the reason behind it, spraying Vegeta – The PRINCE of all Saiyans - with super powered water pistols, is hilarious.

**-Two Hours Later-**

"This is boring Trunks! Is he EVER going to come out?"

"Grrr pipe down Goten!"

"But Trunks I'm HUUUUUUUNGRY! I haven't eaten in AAAAGES! He's gonna train forEVER in there! I wanna…" Goten's wailing was cut off by Trunks.

"SHUT UP GOTEN! Look, ok I've got an idea!"

Trunks creeps out from behind the bush and runs into the kitchen. After a second or two, he comes back with a little golden bell.

"Whats that for Trunks?"

"Shhhh! It's the dinner bell! My mom rings it when she's done making food! All we gotta do is ring it and my dad will come running out!"

"Oh that's a good idea Trunks."

"Of course it is! Ok, get ready…"

The boys quickly grab and aim their water pistols and …

DING DING DING DING DING

"Wow that thing is loud"

" Shush Goten he's coming!"

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As always, I implore you to review

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	2. Gooey Gel?

Disclaimer - Just pretend I wrote something witty up here, the gist being that I don't own Dragonball Z.

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Chapter 2 – Gooey Gel?

:: _Previously on_ _- _**Vegeta's Hair **::

"Shhhh! It's the dinner bell! My mom rings it when she's done making food! All we gotta do is ring it and my dad will come running out!"

"Oh that's a good idea Trunks."

"Of course it is! Ok, get ready…"

The boys quickly grab and aim their water pistols and …

DING DING DING DING DING

"Wow that thing is loud"

" Shush Goten he's coming!"

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Trunks and Goten quivered with excitement as they heard the GR turn off and loud footsteps approach the door.

The door to the GR creaked open slowly, and a shock of black spiky hair poked out; immediately followed by the face of Vegeta, the Saiyan no Ouji. He looked around cautiously, searching the area for danger. Finding no immediate threats in his vicinity (AN:-cough-cough-), Vegeta hurried down the steps towards (what he thought would be) food. –clunk- one step… –clunk- two steps… -thump- ground.

"NOW!"

"Whaa-?"

Vegeta was cut off by an explosion of water hitting his face, and a second one aimed for … his hair.

Vegeta's hair fell over with a wet -splat-

"AHHAHAHAHAHAH! I TOLD YA TRUNKS!"

"GRRRRRRR! YOU BRATS ARE GONNA PAY! PREPARE TO DIE!"

Vegeta angrily shook his head (like a doggy) effectively shaking the water away from his face … and out of his hair …

-sproing!-

"You've got to be kidding me"

But before Trunks could comment on this new development, his angry father ran at them in a deadly saiyan rage.

"RUN GOTEN RUN! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!"

Trunks and Goten ran as fast as they possibly could, with Vegeta hot in pursuit!

"YOU GODDAMN BRATS! JUST YOU WAIT TIL I CATCH YOU! I'LL SHOVE MY FOOT UP YOUR TINY LITTLE ASSES SO HARD YOUR HEADS WILL POP OFF!"

Goten screamed and took to the air, with Trunks following suit. All of a sudden explosions starting ringing out all around them!

"I'VE GOT YOU NOW YOU LITTLE BASTARDS!"

"This is the end Trunks! You're dad is gonna kill us!"

-BOOM!-

"Ahhhhhh!"

"Goten!"

Goten was hit! He went down! Trunks dived to help his fallen friend but just as he grabbed hold of Goten's shirt a hand latched onto his shoulder.

"I've got you know brat! You're dead." Trunks squeaked in fear.

"Help! Somebody! Help me! My dad's gonna kill me!"

Outside Capsule Corp. it was as quiet as a grave, (all the neighbors hiding in their houses in fear) but at the sound of Trunks' desperate plea for help, the SPCSC (society for the prevention of cruelty to small children) miraculously appeared!

"Sir you are under arrest!" shouted a fat police man with a megaphone.

"SCREW YOU!" shouted … guess who.

"Goten! Goten! Wake up! We're saved!"

Vegeta powered up a massive ki blast and totally vaporized them ALL! A resounding –BOOM- … shook the city!

"Scratch that … we're screwed."

"VEGETA! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT-"

Bulma appeared at the front door and marched across (what was left) of the front lawn right up to the Prince of all Saiyans and started screaming at him.

"SHUT THE HELL UP WOMAN I'LL DO WHAT I LIKE!"

A shouting match to end all shouting matches began on the Briefs' front lawn, and two certain little demi-saiyans just happened to inch away unnoticed by the screaming adults.

_**-Back in Trunks' Room-**_

"Whoo that was a close one Trunks! We need to be more careful or we'll get killed! Your dad is mean!"

"Well at least we found out that _I_ was right and he doesn't use that icky gooey gel!"

"Yea whatever …" Goten pouted

"So what _does _he use then?"

"Hmm I dunno …"

Both boys thought hard for a few minutes (well … Trunks thought. Who knows what Goten was doing…)

"Maybe he super-glues it!" Trunks exclaimed

"But wouldn't that have come off with the water?"

"Not with that special water-proof super glue!"

"Hmm yea that's true…but how are we gonna find out?"

"Easy! We'll just have to touch his hair, and see if its all hard and stuff."

"Uhh Trunks …"

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It's great when you go back and look at this crap and realize how stupid you were when you were 14. Ugh. Review, commenting on my latent retardation.


	3. Super Glue Disaster

Disclaimer - Does anyone read these anymore?

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Chapter 3 - Super Glue

Trunks and Goten crept up on a sleeping Vegeta. The saiyan no ouji was snoring loudly on the couch, seemingly oblivious to the world.

Goten climbed carefully on to the couch, trying desperately not to wake Trunk's volatile father.

Goten reached his hand out to touch Vegeta's spiky black hair, and Vegeta twitched almost imperceptibly, causing the hand to hastily retreat.

"Truuuuuuuunks!" Goten whispered, "I'm scared! Can't you do this?"

"Goten just touch it and get it over with! Don't be such a baby!"

Whimpering and muttering something that sounded like "It's your dad…" Goten gathered up his courage and lunged forward, grabbing a dark lock in his pudgy fingers.

"Wow Trunks! Its n…not hard at all! It's really soft…"

Goten was so enthralled with the softness of Vegeta's hair that he forgot the (rather important) fact that he was petting the head of the one person most likely to kill him on the planet.

Vegeta twitched in his sleep, and his snoring became irregular. Even in his sleep the violation of his personal bubble could not be ignored.

Despite Goten's delightedly oblivious murmurs, Trunks immediately noticed what was happening. He started backing away…very…slowly…

"G…G…Goten!" he hissed.

"So sooooooft! Oh my gosh! How does he…"

"Goten!"

"Mmmmmm!"

The snoring stopped abruptly. An eerie silence filled the room broken only by poor Goten, who hadn't a clue.

"Man Trunks you gotta come here and touch it!"

One of Vegeta's eyes opened. Then the other. They both slowly moved to look at Goten.

"GOTEN!" Trunks screamed

His attention finally gained, Goten turned around to look at Trunks, who was by now halfway down the hallway.

"Shhhh Trunks you'll wake up…V…V…VEGETA!"

"Goten screamed in terror as Vegeta's hand slowly moved up towards Goten's throat…

"RUN GOTEN RUN!"

But Goten was frozen to the spot in fear, one hand still grasping Vegeta's oh-so-soft black hair.

Vegeta's hand closed around Goten's throat, his eyes sparkling dangerously…

"I've got you now brat"

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Review ... or i'll kill you. And your family. And eat all your bacon.


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